Monday, October 10, 2011

Day 3....meeting grandpa

Orphanage Day 3

Sunday, October 9, 2011

I wish I could tell you I was handling this situation with the best stride and attitude possible. I wish I could tell you there is no stress and that I am perfectly content with where things are.

I have to admit that this trusting God thing completely is HARD.

I am not handling it as well as I’d like to think I am.

I’m not perfect.

Far from it.

I am struggling… VERY hard with this entire scenario.

I actually had the worst migraine headache of my life Saturday. It hit me on the way back from the orphanage.

I get the ones that blind you and then give you a killer headache and finally sometimes if they are really intense they make me sick.

I had one of those.. actually 2.. back to back.

I was so sick over meeting Grandpa and what he might say or do to influence Tanya’s decision as well as brother.

I was up vomiting until 4 am Sunday morning at which time I finally fell asleep. I had to get up at 7am to get ready and pack so we could go to Tanya’s performance and move.

Unfortunately, the alarm did not get set properly and we were awakened by the new tenants knocking at our door.

Thankfully they just wanted to drop their luggage and come back. We hurried to pack all our belongings and get dressed and out the door in the next 20-25 minutes.

The landlord showed up to collect the rent and cracked me up… we paid her the rent and then she said in her broken English, internet work?

We said yes.

Good, 50 hryvna!


She totally just got us for an extra 50 hryvna!

It’s only worth about $6.50 but it was ok, we had no way to communicate with her that it was to be included and it was worth the extra to be able to skype with my babies!

I just couldn’t get over it!

Internet good?

Good! 50 hyrvna!

Ha ha ha

We made it to the orphanage early and the gates were still locked. A group of workers were walking to the orphanage shortly after we arrived and they were trying to communicate with us that they did not have keys and were going to find them.

A bit later a man left and went to the village across the street, coming back with a huge key ring, I mean HUGE, like a small pumpkin round size, with only a few keys on it.

While he was gone to get the keys we saw a few boys come out by the fence and smoke. I knew this was not right and would not be allowed if the orphanage workers were aware of it but I couldn’t do anything b/c we have no way to communicate today as Sasha couldn’t be with us.

I decided that I’d let Sasha know the next day to tell the director so they can keep an eye on it.

As I sat in the car trying to eat a couple of crackers to settle my stomach, I then heard screaming and looked up and there were those same boys that were smoking, now throwing large rocks at another boy.

They were so mean!

I looked out and Bryan was out there and was watching them. He started to walk over to them but they stopped so he went on to the orphanage house to try to find out about the key. A few minutes later, again, those boys started stoning the little boy that had come back. I jumped out of the car and yelled NIT! STOP!

They stopped and looked at me and said something in Russian. Once they figured out I didn’t know what they were saying, they laughed and started to joke about me saying NIT! STOP!

Oh well, they stopped!

I was furious!

These boys could have killed that little boy if even one of those rocks would have hit him in the head.

I mean they were big!

The man from the village finally arrived back with the keys and we went in and parked under the tree.

We were so excited about Tanya’s performance!

As we walked up to the building there was an old man standing out front smoking. I wondered if that was the man who we were waiting to meet.

I asked a couple of the girls where our Tanya was and they told me to follow them up the stairs into the building. On the way they were telling me that it was indeed Tanya’s Diedueskah. (Grandpa)

We got inside and headed up the first flight of stairs where we were met by the cutest potato ever! She was so shy and looking to see what we thought of her outfit.

We loved it of course and I scooped her up and said you look so cute! I love your potato costume!

She gave Daddy hugs and took my hand to lead us to the performance area. She told us to have a seat and off she went to join her class to be ready for the show. We were flagged down by a caregiver who motioned for us to come to the very front where they had 3 seats lined up on the left side of the auditorium in front of the front row on the side of the wall. They wanted us to be sure to be able to see our baby girl perform.

We felt so special.

We were VIP for this performance and that was alright by us!

A few minutes later I saw Tanya’s diedueska come in the door. I asked Bryan, should we invite him to come and sit with us?

Sure he said.

So, I hopped up and made my way through the sea of children and caretakers to the back of the room where I greeted him with a smile and asked “Tonya’s Diedueshka?” He looked at me a bit funny and I said “melinki Tanya.. Diadueshka?” (Little Tanya’s grandpa?) to which he replied Dah.

I reached out my hand to shake his hand that was so worn from years of life that it had become ridden with arthritis. As he placed his hand in mine I said “Alesa, would you like to come sit with us?” he of course didn’t understand anything other than my name but he obliged. I led him through the crowd which seemed to split as we walked through and patted the seat next to mine for him to sit down. I introduced him to Bryan and that was the extent of our conversation.

The rest would have to be what we picked up from each other’s unspoken words. The glimmer of an eye, the wave of a hand, the smile on a face, these would be our means of communication.

A worker came up and talked with him briefly after we sat down and all I could make out was our names and that we were from America to get Tanya and didn’t he want that.

His reply:

Nit hoiches.

(I don’t want it)

My heart sank.

I could feel my stomach in my throat and I shot up a few flare prayers. God, let him see how much she means to us.

Let him see how much we mean to her!

Let him know we already care so much for her and want what is best for her!

Lord, he’s not going to live much longer, please don’t let him put his wants ahead of her needs.

Please help me God.

To be continued….


  1. I've been reading your blog since Adrian's adoption. I was sad when you lost Anastasia... And now I hope Tanya and her brother will become your children soon! Don't give up!
    Write what happened next, please!
    God bless you!